Yes, it finally happened to me. Not at home, or in a car at a park, but in a fancy restaurant in the middle of dinner. I wasn’t expecting it at all. It caught me completely by surprise, sneaky!

It all started with me ordering a first ever restaurant meal just for the girls (ok, and me). Their first 3 cheese Mac & Cheese. Those twins had their forks ready to stab me if macaroni wasn’t traveling to their mouth at a speed of light! And all of the sudden, my Bonus baby decides to turn purple and red and purple. I lost the count of different shades: it was a 4th of July fireworks display.

I was expecting, well, a little surprise in there. We rush to a restroom and of course, there is no changing table. But hey, for someone who decided she should write a post about different ways to change a baby with no table and help, I figured, I can handle it. And I did! Until, that is, I saw that she was covered in breakfast, lunch and dinner all the way to her chest. Not literally but actually. Sorry to gross anyone out, but that baby went straight into a sink and she got a bath. In a handicap restroom, in a restaurant, in a mall…While trying to juggle her so all that wonderful corn, peas and sweet potato hash doesn’t get onto my brand new (how stupid!) shirt. Ah, if only I could film myself, trying to lavirate Bonus baby between hands and knees, trying to dry her and dress her so that she wouldn’t touch the icky floor.

When I emerged 15 minutes later, I demanded a nice Patron shot. Silver I said, chilled, not stirred.

Yes, motherhood has its curve balls. But as long as there is tequila, I will have the imagination and patience to deal with it.